So, I’ve sent my resume out a hell of a lot of times in the past 2 years, and I’ve made some changes to it along the way. I’ve had people look at it, I’ve fixed it up here and there, but before I send it out, I always DOUBLE CHECK the entire resume. A typo, a spelling error, or an ignorant mistake can cost you a job. I don’t have room for that, as it’s hard enough to find work without having my resume and/or cover letter come across as idiotic.

One thing I do know? If you’re writing a resume, don’t use eight different fonts as you do so. And, please ensure that you never, ever use Comic Sans as one of those fonts. Yes, this is an actual issue that my friend who works in HR at a fancy-schmancy hotel downtown came across earlier this week. Fantastic, eh?

For your viewing pleasure on this lovely Friday morning, I give you some more of her ‘Resume Fails’… (God, I love this part of her job). As usual, all names and identifying information has been changed to protect the ignorant, but everything else is taken verbatim… seriously.

-I am interested to work as a housekeeping person. My mom always makes me do chores so I am used to cleaning my room, doing laundry and changing sheets in my own house.

-I can work 7 days a week except Thursdays

This is what happens when someone else does your resume for you, emails it to you and then you simply hit the forward button and don’t change anything… Email Subject line – Fwd: Baby here is your resume that I shrunk.

-A 23 year-old, collage student, who is major in Physics and Mathematics, and also minor in Accounting.

Email Subject Line: Look for a job (Sorry)

-21th, May 2012″, “I have traveled up 15 countries “, “I am currently graduated as a Bachelor of Management from University of British Columbia. “I believe that my strong ability to communicate customers…”

-Hi,HR resourse, I’m a sfu Part-time student, and I’m very interested in your liquor store attendant position. Im friendly and energetic person and I have very excellent customer service, which I get from the restaurant I worked.

-Objective – Room Service. Cashier. Switchboard. Communications. No Police. No Military.”

-Front Desk Assistant – a really nice job giving gentle assistance with care and kindess to ensure coming to and returning here. Call (123-456-7890). MIGHTY FREAK

-I have an extensive amount of experience in the customer service feild.I am also a certified Bartneder

-I would have sent you my resumes but my internet connection ran off (but you could email me to tell me that?)

-I saw your posting just now for the Hotel Room Attendant Adventures and Experiences just now on craigslists, and I’m salivating. so I can’t imagine a better adventure for a career than construction Hotel Room Attendant excitement and fun… (and on top of this, they forgot to attach their resume… like it would have mattered anyway)

-Skills – Hygiene, including bathing & dressing

-I am confident in my resume that I don’t require a cover letter

Enjoy your Friday, and have a great weekend, all!!

xo

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